my internal rant.

if i gave you the world could i be your girl, your girl for twenty five minutes no stop just please just listen i cant fight or shake the feeling.

im angry but still willing.

im lost and i dont wanna be found.

please just listen dont make no sound

i want forever i want eternity

i want bliss i want whats supposed to be

but how can i know whats supposd to be if you stay limiting yourself to the others you see

hes like you but hes not you

my heart aint ready my eyes stay heavy

im in it to win it but your blocking me from the winners entrance

and as i stand aside i watch the other lady have my guy the guy that i thought that would never leave myside.

i'm a lady but i'd be damned if i'm limited.

nah no regrets.

the feeling he gave was beyond metaphors and synonyms.

nah no emotion.

my heart with someone else.

oooh but that feeling i felt.

that feeling of release.

that feeling of just pleasuring me.

maybe its more than what eyes can see.

maybe its more than what can be touched.

but i'm in bliss with the way that he hit this.

sent volumes and gave me rises.

they can call me whatever they want.

but in the end i get what i want.

the double standard kills my possibilities.

shit i'm a lady but i'd be damned if im limited

shordy was beyond the word gifted.

beyond manuscript.

i'm a loyal lover never choosy

i'm a impatient lover but i know my duty

my heart aint even in tune with you

i'm missing a piece that has no crack to fit

i just wish you'd love me like you wanted to

i just wish she never existed better yet you too

and as the tears roll down my face

i can always remember your embrace and my soft spot i have for you

& as i get all these numbers.

& as i kiss these boys who don't mean a thing.

my heart still belongs to you.

my body got your name on it and i aint even tatt'd.

i'm a loyal lover never choosy

i hate how you abused me

but someone will love me

and that someone will be better than whatever you think you are or could be.

Random Reciept Paper Words.

"As I go on and rant about would should and should not be I realize that at the end of the end of the day all I got is me."

"Used to be the that girl to shutup and go with the flow but sorry can't do that anymore my mind is beyond my control can't confirm to the virgo."

"When the feeling aint reciprocated your faith gets a lil bit outdated."

rest in peace to how i feel.

i've gone so long with doing without

my hearts so heavy indefinetly no doubt

i dont know why i need you

but i cant stop crying

i dont know why i breathe you

thats why i'm dying

i'm a lover

not a fighter

i cant shake it

i try to look around for something new to replace it

crying a river that starts from a pond

pondering my future ready for infinity and beyond

your nochalant attitude sends me to rises of no return

i keep wondering when wiill i learn

and as the song plays on repeat and me and my tears meet

your love for me aint free

it causes me pain suffering and no longevity

thats how i knw your not the man for me

the man that loves me would never hurt me untentionally or intentionally

me hurting would hut him internally.

What I want

What I want is simplistic
A fool that is too complex may fuck up and miss it
But complexity is a turn on
But a fool is a turn off
A light switch can be a metaphor
What I want can't be ignored
One day I will receive what I'm looking for
I'm deep as any shore
I'm complicated but make sense
I'm something you can't forget
What I want I will find
And I bet our hearts will beat the same rhyme :)

Sunday morning synopsis.

Whom takes notice.
Is the one that is patient.
Patience isn't my best quality but I watch slowly and acknowledge what I see.
Beyond every insecurity.
Behind mac makeup false lashes and social network personalities.
Surpassing feelings.
Further than their true meaning.
What does is what will be done, only person who makes that decision lives.
Don't fabricate excuses to save your ass in the future.
A lie is a lie and it'll fester inside.
Beyond words have true meanings burried and covered w/fabrications.
What ends up shown as a significant surprise.
One that is not planned and unexpected and as my generation states on the known twitter website "on to the next one.."Jayz told them right.

I'm backk!

I'll be updating a lot now, I have a lot of poems on my bberry which will be uploaded soon! Work & skool have been kicking my ass but I'm managing! I also have a blog on tumblr, its a private one but anyone can look cuz idc! colanotthesoda.tumblr.com =)). ttyl.

my language.

convert your currency

excuse my arrogance please

but little daddy you aint in my leauge

it extends beyond bank of america

i dont need your sponsorship i need your intellect

i can pay for my own shit

now convert your brain cells

use a dictionary because i speak very well

i can impress you on every level

no rosetta stone, and nah i aint no nia long

i'm chocolate thick & sassy

i'lll cook & do anything to make you happy

but first i need more than the obvious thats laid before me

i need you to enjoy me

details are required before you become the man of hire

this isn't an interview but i still need to school you

come pre packaged cuz i'm not here to change you.

i just wanna love you, but this task climbing over this wall of mines...ohh i challenge you.